Taking up arms in defense of my property

[lar]

Sometimes a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do.

We are fortunate to have a beautiful pair of Cardinals in our neighborhood. They seem to like the trees behind the house. This weekend I decided the neighborly thing to do would be to put out feed for them. There is a bird feeder in the yard so on Saturday I filled it with a nice mixture of seeds. I wondered how long it would take the Cardinals to notice.

As it turned out, it only took the neighborhood squirrels 30 minutes or so to discover that there was a new food source available to them. Being squirrels it did not occur to them that the new food source was meant for somebody else. Squirrels have lousy manners.

As a deterrent to the seed thieves I got out my trusty Daisy Red Ryder BB gun. I didn't want to kill the squirrels. I just wanted them to know that partaking at the bird feeder was going to be a painful experience. I'm proud to say that although I've not fired my Red Ryder for quite a number of years I was able to hit what I was aiming at and the squirrel experienced quite an unexpected pain at the base of his tail. This was repeated twice more before he began to get the idea.

Apparently squirrels are smarter than I gave them credit for. After about an hour's cessation of hostilities they were back at it, apparently having reasoned that I couldn't possibly be watching them every moment. They did learn to skedaddle as soon as they heard the back door open so I took some small comfort from that.

Now the workweek has begun and I'm not around to defend my property. I fear my Cardinals are getting severely short-changed in the food department.

This bird feeding thing is becoming an expensive proposition. Now I'm going to have to order a squirrel proof feeder and a pole to sit it on.

Note to LJ: Just in case my aim deteriorates and I accidentally off one of the little buggers, I'll pack it in dry ice and send it over. You and the missus can have a nice meal of fresh (more or less) squirrel. I imagine it will be a welcome change from your usual road-kill squirrel fare.

Edit: Janice has now taken to calling me "Elmer Fudd". She seems to be amused by my efforts to teach table manners to our backyard pests.

[drlj]

I appreciate that you would think of me, Lar. There may be laws against mailing dead squirrels, though.

Most squirrels are smarter than the average Hoosier. I know that sets the bar pretty low, but as a Hoosier hunter from Warsaw, IN once said,
"If'n you want to catch a squirrel you has to think like a nut. Squirrels love nuts. Think like a nut and they will come right to you."

[Marshall]

How is the bird feeder set up? Hung? On a pole?

A couple of years ago (means probably 4) I bought a cheapo ($7) pole mounted bird feeder from Lowes. ANd I bought a 8 ft aluminum pipe. (cheap). Worked great, but the squirrels could climb the pole. I greased teh pole. They still climbed the pole.

I had to go to a fancy specialty store and bought a $35 baffle to mount on the pole below the feeder. Looks a little ugly. But it works. I've seen squirrels climb the pole, get up to the baffle, and look confused, and back down the pole.

It works.

[Cosmic Wonder]

Really Lar? Your put out food that attracks wildlife and then your reaction is to shoot them?

Squirrel proof feeders are abundant and relatively inexpensive. They can be hung from trees so you don't have to install a pole.

If you prefer to feed the decendents of dinosaurs instead of rodents in trees, I suppose that's your business, but shooting at them after luring them with food seems out of bounds to me.

Mike

[brucemacneill]

My brother had a squirrel problem like that and he got a squirrel proof, supposedly, feeder for the birds. It had a spring loaded cage that would come down if a squirrel climbed on it and block the holes in the feeder. However, it soon appeared that the squirrels had sub-contracted the job out to a couple of lighter chipmunks who could climb the feeder without triggering the cage and would then dig the seed out, which fell to the ground where the squirrels were waiting. Good luck.

[lar]

The feeder hangs from a shepard's hook. It's not much of a challenge even for a law-abiding squirrel much less the felons that hang around my yard.

Time to get serious and get me a squirrel-proof feeder and a different pole.

[drlj]

I spent 25 years living on the edge of woods while trying to feed the many songbirds that were there. Squirrel proof feeders slow them down but squirrels will figure out a way to get seed. We also had to deal with raccoons, an animal I truly hate, and chipmunks.
It finally got to be more of a pain than it was worth and we took the feeders down.
I once hit a squirrel with a broom. He seemed surprised.

[Village Idiot]

Grease the pole. Vaseline or something. That works.

[timfarney]

Squirrel-proof feeder. That’s cute.

[majorminor]

[Deleted]

Get a Roach motel and take the sticky liner out. Put it close to the feeder and see what happens.

[RickW]

We have a squirrel proof feeder. There is a cage around it. Works perfectly, and we no longer see squirrels.

[Marty]

Mar 12, 2018 9:27:49 GMT -5 Cosmic Wonder said:

Really Lar? Your put out food that attracks wildlife and then your reaction is to shoot them?

Squirrel proof feeders are abundant and relatively inexpensive. They can be hung from trees so you don't have to install a pole.

If you prefer to feed the decendents of dinosaurs instead of rodents in trees, I suppose that's your business, but shooting at them after luring them with food seems out of bounds to me.

Mike

But squirrels eat a whole lot more than a bird. And if the feed has sunflower seeds they will haul those off to store for later. Uncontrolled the squirrels will take 90% of what you put out, every time you fill the feeder. Yes get a squirrel proof feeder, but go ahead and protect the one you have, just don't kill the squirrels, those are for the hawks and eagles. 

[lar]

I have no interest in killing the squirrels. I just want to dissuade them. By and large I like squirrels. Hell, I'd feed them too except that they would eat what I put out for them and continue to raid the bird feeder. I see little reason to be nice to an animal that is devoid of decent manners.

[dradtke]

I hate to break it to you, Lar, but your hunting has nothing to do woth Janice calling you Elmer Fudd. She sent a private message to the forum a few days ago asking if we've noticed that you're starting to lisp and wondering if you're having a stroke or a drinking problem.

[millring]

ve-e-e-e-ewwy funny.

[dradtke]

You think shooting squiwwews is funny, do you?

[brucemacneill]

Mar 12, 2018 11:43:55 GMT -5 lar said:

I have no interest in killing the squirrels. I just want to dissuade them. By and large I like squirrels. Hell, I'd feed them too except that they would eat what I put out for them and continue to raid the bird feeder. I see little reason to be nice to an animal that is devoid of decent manners.

Here's what you need:

[Marshall]

Can you get a bump-stock for that Red Ryder?


Just wonderin'

[Village Idiot]

Put Smarties in the feeder instead of M&Ms.