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Post by Cornflake on Nov 8, 2021 20:21:48 GMT -5
“Hearing nuns' confessions is like being stoned to death with popcorn.” ― Fulton J. Sheen
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Post by Marshall on Nov 10, 2021 10:52:28 GMT -5
Super Size Me
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Post by kbcolorado on Nov 10, 2021 12:59:15 GMT -5
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Post by aquaduct on Nov 10, 2021 15:43:10 GMT -5
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Post by Rob Hanesworth on Nov 11, 2021 13:05:02 GMT -5
After 72 pages it is hard to know if this has already been posted. Forgive me if it has.
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Post by kenlarsson on Nov 12, 2021 10:31:37 GMT -5
Medical terminology explained........
Artery – The study of paintings
Bacteria – Back door to cafeteria
Barium – What doctors do when patients die
Benign – What you be, after you be eight
Caesarean Section – A neighborhood in Rome
Cat scan – Searching for Kitty
Cauterize – Made eye contact with her
Coma – A punctuation mark
Dilate – To live long
Enema – Not a friend
Fester – Quicker than someone else
Fibula – A small lie
Impotent – Distinguished, well known
Labor Pain – Getting hurt at work
Medical Staff – A Doctor’s cane
Morbid – A higher offer
Nitrates – Rates of Pay for Working at Night, Normally more money than Days
Node – I knew it
Outpatient – A person who has fainted
Pelvis – Second cousin to Elvis
Post Operative – A letter carrier
Recovery Room – Place to do upholstery
Rectum – Nearly killed him
Secretion – Hiding something
Seizure – Roman Emperor
Tablet – A small table
Terminal Illness – Getting sick at the airport
Tumor – One plus one more
Urine – Opposite of you’re out
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Post by kenlarsson on Nov 15, 2021 9:06:23 GMT -5
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Post by Marshall on Nov 15, 2021 10:25:55 GMT -5
An old, blind Marine wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels.
After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, 'Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?' The bar immediately falls absolutely silent.
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, 'Before you tell that joke I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:
1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter.
5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.
Now, think about it seriously, do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?'
The blind Marine thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, 'No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.'
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Post by kenlarsson on Nov 15, 2021 16:03:52 GMT -5
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Post by Marshall on Nov 15, 2021 23:17:53 GMT -5
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Post by jdd2 on Nov 16, 2021 1:02:07 GMT -5
Not a meme thing, but... I haven't touched a shotgun or rifle in decades, but even I know what's wrong here.
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Post by theevan on Nov 16, 2021 6:59:39 GMT -5
Not a meme thing, but... I haven't touched a shotgun or rifle in decades, but even I know what's wrong here. Okay, what's wrong here?
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Post by theevan on Nov 16, 2021 7:01:02 GMT -5
Shooting folks in a courtroom is bad form. No finger on trigger unless target is acquired!
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Dub
Administrator
I'm gettin' so the past is the only thing I can remember.
Posts: 20,330
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Post by Dub on Nov 16, 2021 11:36:16 GMT -5
Shooting folks in a courtroom is bad form. No finger on trigger unless target is acquired! We’ll, yeah, but courtroom or not, it’s traditional to have an ammo clip in place whoever you’re shooting.
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Post by Marshall on Nov 16, 2021 11:51:06 GMT -5
FOUL CALLED!15 yards and loss of posting privilege's on this thread. (Take your political/societal bullshit comments elsewhere. This is a joke thread. Jokes ONLY ! If it ain't intended to be funny for everyone, don't say it here.)
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Post by jdd2 on Nov 16, 2021 19:04:45 GMT -5
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Post by jdd2 on Nov 16, 2021 19:11:09 GMT -5
sort of a christmas picture?
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Post by TKennedy on Nov 18, 2021 15:45:25 GMT -5
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Post by kenlarsson on Nov 18, 2021 17:11:18 GMT -5
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Post by billhammond on Nov 18, 2021 17:31:51 GMT -5
That one took me a while!
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