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Post by jdd2 on Sept 18, 2016 17:30:52 GMT -5
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Post by drlj on Sept 18, 2016 18:08:17 GMT -5
That is the craziest thing I have ever read.
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Post by dradtke on Sept 18, 2016 18:19:12 GMT -5
Damn. There goes another pastime.
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Post by brucemacneill on Sept 18, 2016 18:25:58 GMT -5
Having grown up around chickens, like all birds, they're filthy. They have other diseases spread within chicken-shit, notably respiratory diseases like histoplasmosis which appears like a flu and most people get over it but it can spread to the eyes, my wife's case, and destroy the retina. There was also a reason we vaccinated the chickens, against chicken pox, which has now fallen out of favor with the anti-vaccine crowd. I would expect the uneducated household chicken farmers to have some unexpected problems.
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Post by Village Idiot on Sept 18, 2016 19:28:16 GMT -5
Too late now.
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Post by drlj on Sept 18, 2016 20:33:36 GMT -5
In KY, calling someone a chicken kisser is likely to lead to a duel. If you call someone that twice, it could be a dual duel, which is very serious. In IN, calling someone a squirrel kisser is considered a compliment. Saying that someone kisses like a squirrel is just plain strange, but I have heard teenagers say it about each other.
In IA, calling someone a pork tenderloin head means the head is sort of flat and, perhaps, crispy. At least, I think that is what it means. I really don't know.
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Post by Village Idiot on Sept 18, 2016 20:36:42 GMT -5
Yes, that's what it means, which is a far cry from Wisconsin Cheese Heads. At least in Iowa we wear the real thing on our heads, not fake ones made out of sponges.
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Post by theevan on Sept 18, 2016 20:51:33 GMT -5
The writer steadfastly stuck to the facts and resisted going tongue-in-cheek...
Until that lest set of paragraphs.
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Post by drlj on Sept 18, 2016 21:06:51 GMT -5
This is what happens when trendy hipster doofuses decide they want to get back to the land and become urban food gatherers. Real farmers do not kiss their chickens. Nor do they kiss their cows or pigs. They raise them and then they either eat the products the animals produce, like eggs, or they eat the animals themselves. They may smack their own lips after eating a particularly tasty chicken, and they may even cook the chicken using a French recipe but they would never, in a million years, French a chicken. Real farmers are not silly. Urban hipster doofuses are not only silly, they are also quite dumb or they would not be kissing the livestock to begin with. These are the same folks who move into the neighborhood, order a $4500 stainless steel and crystal chicken coop from Hammacher Schlemmer and then put it in the backyard with chickens that they buy at some chicken boutique for $375 each--you know, the kind that lay green shelled eggs. They think of the chickens as pets and put glittery collars on them so they can chicken walk them through the gated community in which they live. They give the chickens cute names. Farmers know that giving a cute name to something makes it harder to eat so they don't do that. They give the animals a number and, as fans of Chinese food can attest, meals that have a number can be quite tasty.
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Post by Village Idiot on Sept 18, 2016 21:38:32 GMT -5
Good post, LJ. I was about to write something along those lines, but you nailed it.
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Post by drlj on Sept 18, 2016 22:38:07 GMT -5
Thanks, Todd. I guess I am just not a hipster doofus fan.
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Post by majorminor on Sept 19, 2016 8:23:00 GMT -5
This is what happens when trendy hipster doofuses decide they want to get back to the land and become urban food gatherers. Real farmers do not kiss their chickens. Nor do they kiss their cows or pigs. They raise them and then they either eat the products the animals produce, like eggs, or they eat the animals themselves. They may smack their own lips after eating a particularly tasty chicken, and they may even cook the chicken using a French recipe but they would never, in a million years, French a chicken. Real farmers are not silly. Urban hipster doofuses are not only silly, they are also quite dumb or they would not be kissing the livestock to begin with. These are the same folks who move into the neighborhood, order a $4500 stainless steel and crystal chicken coop from Hammacher Schlemmer and then put it in the backyard with chickens that they buy at some chicken boutique for $375 each--you know, the kind that lay green shelled eggs. They think of the chickens as pets and put glittery collars on them so they can chicken walk them through the gated community in which they live. They give the chickens cute names. Farmers know that giving a cute name to something makes it harder to eat so they don't do that. They give the animals a number and, as fans of Chinese food can attest, meals that have a number can be quite tasty.  |
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Post by Doug on Sept 19, 2016 8:28:18 GMT -5
This is what happens when trendy hipster doofuses decide they want to get back to the land and become urban food gatherers. Real farmers do not kiss their chickens. Nor do they kiss their cows or pigs. They raise them and then they either eat the products the animals produce, like eggs, or they eat the animals themselves. They may smack their own lips after eating a particularly tasty chicken, and they may even cook the chicken using a French recipe but they would never, in a million years, French a chicken. Real farmers are not silly. Urban hipster doofuses are not only silly, they are also quite dumb or they would not be kissing the livestock to begin with. These are the same folks who move into the neighborhood, order a $4500 stainless steel and crystal chicken coop from Hammacher Schlemmer and then put it in the backyard with chickens that they buy at some chicken boutique for $375 each--you know, the kind that lay green shelled eggs. They think of the chickens as pets and put glittery collars on them so they can chicken walk them through the gated community in which they live. They give the chickens cute names. Farmers know that giving a cute name to something makes it harder to eat so they don't do that. They give the animals a number and, as fans of Chinese food can attest, meals that have a number can be quite tasty. My sister was like that. But my BIL fixed it. Buy 4 hogs with friend, keep two give him two. Let wife name them. When ready for the table swap hogs with friend and butcher his two (that his wife named) while he butchers the two your wife named.  |
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Post by fauxmaha on Sept 19, 2016 10:49:12 GMT -5
This is what happens when trendy hipster doofuses decide they want to get back to the land and become urban food gatherers. Real farmers do not kiss their chickens. Nor do they kiss their cows or pigs. They raise them and then they either eat the products the animals produce, like eggs, or they eat the animals themselves. They may smack their own lips after eating a particularly tasty chicken, and they may even cook the chicken using a French recipe but they would never, in a million years, French a chicken. Real farmers are not silly. Urban hipster doofuses are not only silly, they are also quite dumb or they would not be kissing the livestock to begin with. These are the same folks who move into the neighborhood, order a $4500 stainless steel and crystal chicken coop from Hammacher Schlemmer and then put it in the backyard with chickens that they buy at some chicken boutique for $375 each--you know, the kind that lay green shelled eggs. They think of the chickens as pets and put glittery collars on them so they can chicken walk them through the gated community in which they live. They give the chickens cute names. Farmers know that giving a cute name to something makes it harder to eat so they don't do that. They give the animals a number and, as fans of Chinese food can attest, meals that have a number can be quite tasty.  |
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Post by kenlarsson on Sept 19, 2016 11:36:29 GMT -5
What I want to know is it still ok to choke your chicken?
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Post by david on Sept 19, 2016 17:35:48 GMT -5
This is what happens when trendy hipster doofuses decide they want to get back to the land and become urban food gatherers. Real farmers do not kiss their chickens. Nor do they kiss their cows or pigs. They raise them and then they either eat the products the animals produce, like eggs, or they eat the animals themselves. They may smack their own lips after eating a particularly tasty chicken, and they may even cook the chicken using a French recipe but they would never, in a million years, French a chicken. Real farmers are not silly. Urban hipster doofuses are not only silly, they are also quite dumb or they would not be kissing the livestock to begin with. These are the same folks who move into the neighborhood, order a $4500 stainless steel and crystal chicken coop from Hammacher Schlemmer and then put it in the backyard with chickens that they buy at some chicken boutique for $375 each--you know, the kind that lay green shelled eggs. They think of the chickens as pets and put glittery collars on them so they can chicken walk them through the gated community in which they live. They give the chickens cute names. Farmers know that giving a cute name to something makes it harder to eat so they don't do that. They give the animals a number and, as fans of Chinese food can attest, meals that have a number can be quite tasty. I am sensing anger, and perhaps just a little bit of jealousy here. I am wondering if perhaps drlj's favorite chicken ran off with some hipster who paid a little closer attention the the chicken's needs and desires. |
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Post by drlj on Sept 19, 2016 18:31:01 GMT -5
No anger. I love chicken especially with mashed potatoes and gravy.
The young woman who bought our house when we sold last year immediately put a coop and chickens in the backyard. It is her yard now but....
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Post by patrick on Sept 19, 2016 20:22:58 GMT -5
I don't understand why anyone would raise chickens, when you can just fish for them.
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Post by Village Idiot on Sept 19, 2016 20:24:21 GMT -5
I've known people who no nothing about it start raising chickens in town. Then they want to go on vacation, and realize they have a problem.
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Post by Doug on Sept 19, 2016 21:24:27 GMT -5
I've known people who no nothing about it start raising chickens in town. Then they want to go on vacation, and realize they have a problem. No problem.  Dinner. |
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Dinner.