The Squirrels vs. The Church

[Doug]

*The Squirrels vs. The Church*



The Presbyterian church called a meeting to decide what to do about their

squirrels. After much prayer and consideration, they concluded the

squirrels were predestined to be there and they shouldn't interfere with

God's divine will.



At the Baptist church the squirrels had taken an interest in the

baptistery. The deacons met and decided to put a water slide on the

baptistery and let the squirrels drown themselves. The squirrels liked the

slide and, unfortunately, knew instinctively how to swim so twice as many

squirrels showed up the following week.



The Methodist church decided that they were not in a position to harm any

of God's creatures. So, they humanely trapped their squirrels and set them

free near the Baptist Church. Two weeks later the squirrels were back when

the Baptists took down the water slide.



But the Catholic Church came up with a very creative strategy. They

baptized all the squirrels and consecrated them as members of the church.

Now they only see them on Christmas and Easter.



Not much was heard from the Jewish synagogue; they took the first squirrel

and circumcised him. They haven't seen a squirrel since.

[theevan]

I'll save that one

[drlj]

In IN, squirrel is a part of every church supper.

[amanajoe]

In Mississippi, they are part of the revival:

[Chesapeake]

Me, I traded in my squirrel for a dog.