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Post by epaul on May 19, 2023 22:27:04 GMT -5
A couple weeks ago I was in gastorial envy as I read of our Iowans wantonly plucking fresh asparagus by garden and roadside. I could almost taste it; so close and yet so far.
Well, now I am in full asparagus swing. Smack in the middle of a harvest so abundant I can’t put a dent in it even if I started eating it for breakfast and throwing spears at the cat.
Yet, in the shadow of my abundance, my Iowa friends are probably all done with asparagus for the year (or are snipping off those pencil thin ones that are supposed be left to allow the plant to fatten up for the next year).
When the Iowans have, I don’t. When I have, they don’t...
AND THEN IT CAME TO ME LIKE A GIFT FROM THE HEAVENS ABOVE… THE PLAN! THE PERFECT PLAN. A WIN/WIN PLAN!
The plan, the win/win perfect plan:
In early May, when Iowa is loaded with asparagus, Todd will load up a couple bushel baskets of the green delights and drive them up to me in ND. Then in mid-May, when my crop is coming on line, Todd can again drive up to ND, with empty baskets this time, and I will load him up with asparagus to take back to Iowa. IT’S PERFECT. THE PERFECT PLAN. We get to eat asparagus for the entire month!
Why, Todd could even make a stop in the Cities on each trip and drop off some asparagus for Bill and Dave. And St. Cloud and Alec are right along the way.
Let’s get this done, fellas! It is A PERFECT PLAN!
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Post by Marty on May 19, 2023 22:33:43 GMT -5
Todd does the driving and epaul pays for all the gas and motels. Win, win.
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Post by epaul on May 19, 2023 22:38:45 GMT -5
Sorry for the Caps, but I'm so excited. This plan just keeps getting better.
I was thinking of Shannon. I don't even know if asparagus grows down there in Alabama. Well, Alabama is a little far for Todd to drive just to deliver asparagus, but, Shannon could meet him halfway, say in Mississippi somewhere.
And if Todd swings just a little ways west on the return, he could meet Don and Paul in New Mexico, say, and then swing up to the Major's for our West Coast peoples. (and, given that all the baskets are now empty, Todd would be able to fill them with some good horsy pies to fertilize his asparagus beds back in Iowa.
I will spend some time routing out a path east that isn't too far out of his way. But, for now, I just want to relax and soak up some exuberance. I just love it when a plan snaps together like a Lego something or other.
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Post by epaul on May 19, 2023 22:39:55 GMT -5
We'll have to charge one of the Minneapolitans.
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Post by epaul on May 19, 2023 22:48:11 GMT -5
I would, of course, volunteer to split the driving with Todd, but I sold all my cars. Reducing my carbon footprint. I was planning on getting an EV, but I found out all the current ones still need batteries, well, that's dumb, so I guess I will just have to wait a bit.
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Post by millring on May 20, 2023 5:14:59 GMT -5
Make pee smell from coast to coast.
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Post by dradtke on May 20, 2023 11:24:55 GMT -5
I'll put a big box out on the deck do you can drop off the asparagus if we're not home.
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Post by Village Idiot on May 20, 2023 20:28:06 GMT -5
Paul, we've tried this before. If I let people know I'm coming no one is ever home. I'm hoping you have a different tactic in mind.
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Post by epaul on May 21, 2023 11:03:33 GMT -5
I think I do.
We've tried surprise visits (somehow they know and word spreads). We've tried disguises (I don't how we ever thought a fake mustache would work)...
BUT...
If they were to come out of hiding after you left only to discover all their spoons were missing... I think they would be sure to stick around next time you come visit.
Now I don't mean you should actually take the spoons, you don't need anymore court time (given that wardrobe issue in Farmington). Rather, just hide their spoons hither and yon throughout the house as if you were a giant Easter Bunny.
(say, you could borrow Dave's bunny outfit)
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Post by drlj on May 21, 2023 12:15:24 GMT -5
I love asparagus. My favorite is grilled.
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Post by Village Idiot on May 21, 2023 13:47:05 GMT -5
Paul, you've heard of forking a yard, right? You go to someone's house when they are gone and stick a bunch of plastic forks upright in their lawn? Maybe I could to the same thing with spoons. That way I could call someone, Jon Bushouse for example, and say that I only wanted to spoon with him. Would that work? |
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Post by epaul on May 21, 2023 14:22:47 GMT -5
Yes it would.
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Post by dradtke on May 21, 2023 16:03:02 GMT -5
Wait a minute. I finally got the bunny outfit the way I want it. I don't want Todd messing it up again.
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Post by millring on May 21, 2023 19:28:07 GMT -5
I wonder if asparagus is one of those foods like cilantro or black licorice -- nobody is in the middle on -- they either love it or can't eat it?
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Post by epaul on May 21, 2023 20:28:51 GMT -5
Everybody doesn't like black licorice?
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Post by Marty on May 21, 2023 20:32:38 GMT -5
Asparagus depends on the way it's prepared. Cilantro, not if you paid me, tastes like soap. Love real licorice and licorice ice cream is the best.
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Post by John B on May 21, 2023 20:42:28 GMT -5
I don't anticipate needing any spooning until after asparagus season.
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Post by epaul on May 21, 2023 20:49:05 GMT -5
I never think about buying grocery store asparagus in the wintertime. I love asparagus but it isn't an everyday sort of staple. For me, asparagus is a seasonal treat, kind of like sex.
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Post by Village Idiot on May 23, 2023 21:39:22 GMT -5
Or kohlrabi. Which I can pass on. But seasonal asparagus ist wunderbar.
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