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Post by TKennedy on Jun 30, 2019 9:17:00 GMT -5
It’s a big deal and a big milestone in everyone’s life. Hang in there.
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Post by sekhmet on Jun 30, 2019 18:50:48 GMT -5
Jeff, such terrible news! I am so sorry about your mum. There isn't much more one can say. Hugs to you and best wishes for your family.
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Post by dradtke on Jun 30, 2019 19:19:13 GMT -5
Sorry to hear this, Jeff. I've been told they can hear, so keep talking to her. And hold the family close.
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Post by fauxmaha on Jul 30, 2019 11:01:02 GMT -5
Been beyond busy this last month.
Mom is, miraculously, still with us. She has bad days and somewhat better days, but the steady progression is decline. Not good. It's been just over a month since the stroke. She remains paralyzed on her left side, weak on her right, functionally blind, and infrequently lucid.
These last couple of days seem to have been marked by an accelerating decline. I'm guessing we're getting near the end. But who knows? A month ago, the doctors said it was 50/50 she'd make it 48 hours. And those odds would have been 20/80 had she been 80 years old. Well, she just turned 79 a couple of weeks ago.
She is more or less comfortable, but the real tragedy came a few weeks ago when her mind recovered to the point that she gained a reasonably competent understanding of her situation. That was not good. She took it hard.
But there is some good news, such as it is. Mom has 14 grandkids and seven great grandkids and a large group of friends, so she's rarely alone. The hospice people have commented several times that they've never seen so many visitors.
I have two brothers, and one of my great blessings is that we get along well. We've come to where we have something of a separation of responsibilities on handling things. Chicago brother is handling all the final arrangements (somewhat more complex than you'd think because, for equally complicated reasons, my dad is buried in Indiana and we are moving him back to Omaha), Lincoln brother (the cardiologist) is handling the interactions with the hospice people. That leaves me handling the finance stuff and maintaining mom's house. Mostly that means keeping her bills paid, although her roof was destroyed recently by hail so I'm taking care of that. It also occurred to me yesterday that I should empty the perishables from her fridge. The operative phrase there is "just in time".
On top of all that, it looks like Duke is getting close to the end. His hips are shot. Vet says a matter of weeks. I decided a while back that we'll know its time when he can't walk up or down stairs anymore. That day is rapidly approaching.
Months ago, we planned a vacation in Vail for last week. Decided to go ahead and go. It was really nice getting away.
Still grinding away on my "Backyard Wonderland" project. Current phase is rebuilding my ridiculously big (14' x 50') deck. It has been a real blessing having something I can throw myself into.
Remember however many years ago when I built that roof over half of the deck? Well, it turns out the guy who built the original deck shorted me on the piers under the posts, so the whole thing had to be replaced. Doing that while supporting the roof (didn't want to replace that) was complicated as hell. But we got there. New piers, new posts, new beam is all in place. Right now, I'm a little over halfway done with the joist carpentry. That is complicated by the fact that I want to use some of that nifty new synthetic decking, which means my platform needs to be pretty close to perfectly flat, so I am blocking between the joists way more than I probably need to.
Anyway, that's what's going on.
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Post by aquaduct on Jul 30, 2019 11:06:58 GMT -5
Thanks for the update my friend. Others here were asking about you the other day. Hope this does the trick.
God bless.
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Post by sekhmet on Jul 30, 2019 11:23:10 GMT -5
Oh Jeff, I am so sorry to hear this horrible news. I could add all sorts of homilies about the end of life and ... but nothing makes it better. I hope they can make her comfortable in some way.
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Post by Rob Hanesworth on Jul 30, 2019 11:37:05 GMT -5
I have nothing that will really help, but praying the best for your family.
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Post by brucemacneill on Jul 30, 2019 11:41:33 GMT -5
Jeff, I clicked "Like" although it doesn't seem quite right. Hang in there.
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Post by mnhermit on Jul 30, 2019 11:49:13 GMT -5
Jeff, my best to you and your family.
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Post by Russell Letson on Jul 30, 2019 12:13:40 GMT -5
This is the downside to loving someone. I'm glad to read that the rest of your family is there to share the load and comfort your mom and that you have some distractions from the unhappiness that is rolling over you.
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Post by t-bob on Jul 30, 2019 12:20:48 GMT -5
Jeff - Obviously I know about strokes. Crap! a prayer with my piano
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Post by Cornflake on Jul 30, 2019 12:37:42 GMT -5
Peace be with you.
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Post by drlj on Jul 30, 2019 13:06:23 GMT -5
Wishing your entire family well, Jeff.
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Post by AlanC on Jul 30, 2019 14:10:45 GMT -5
I'm glad you have help. That's a biggie. We had a similar division of responsibilities for my mom and dad. For those having to do it all themselves..... well, God bless 'em.
Many of us here have passed that milestone. It can be a real game changer as far as the family dynamic. The next one is the real biggie and more than a few from here have crossed that bar already.
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Post by theevan on Jul 30, 2019 17:42:09 GMT -5
You're amazing. Grace and peace to "all y'all "
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Post by coachdoc on Jul 30, 2019 19:27:42 GMT -5
So sorry, Jeff.
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Post by Village Idiot on Jul 30, 2019 19:29:33 GMT -5
Your news about her having lots of family and friends it great to hear, Jeff. Especially all those grandkids, who are taking the time to visit her. She is very fortunate to have that. Many people don't.
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Tamarack
Administrator
Ancient Citizen
Posts: 9,390
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Post by Tamarack on Jul 30, 2019 22:34:22 GMT -5
Supportive siblings and children are invaluable at times like this. Praying for peace and perseverance for all.
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Post by dradtke on Jul 31, 2019 11:16:49 GMT -5
Thanks for posting, Jeff. Hard times, but in the best situations it brings families together. Peace.
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Post by John B on Jul 31, 2019 20:25:41 GMT -5
Love you, Jeff.
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