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Post by Rob Hanesworth on Nov 16, 2022 13:01:44 GMT -5
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Post by Rob Hanesworth on Nov 16, 2022 13:06:29 GMT -5
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Post by Marshall on Nov 16, 2022 16:53:35 GMT -5
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Post by Rob Hanesworth on Nov 16, 2022 17:49:17 GMT -5
Just as good as when you posted it yesterday.😀 |
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Post by John B on Nov 19, 2022 17:17:31 GMT -5
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Post by Marshall on Nov 22, 2022 23:34:43 GMT -5
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Post by Marshall on Nov 22, 2022 23:35:40 GMT -5
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Post by Marshall on Dec 5, 2022 9:17:27 GMT -5
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Post by Marshall on Dec 5, 2022 9:19:15 GMT -5
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Post by Rob Hanesworth on Dec 5, 2022 16:58:41 GMT -5
Morris and his wife Esther went to the state fair every year, and every year Morris would say, 'Esther, I'd like to ride in that helicopter.' Esther always replied, 'I know Morris, but that Helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars.'
One year Esther and Morris went to the fair, and Morris said, 'Esther, I'm 85 Years old. If I don't ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance.' To this, Esther replied, 'Morris that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars.'
The pilot overheard the couple and said, 'Folks I'll make you a deal. I'll take both of you for a ride, and if you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say a word, I won't charge you. But if you say one word, it's fifty dollars.'
Morris and Esther agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds of fancy maneuvers, but not a word was heard. He did his daredevil tricks over and over again, but still not a word.
When they landed, the pilot turned to Morris and said, 'By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn't. I'm impressed!'
Morris replied, 'Well, to tell you the truth, I almost said something when Esther fell out, but you know, fifty dollars is fifty dollars.’
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Post by Rob Hanesworth on Dec 6, 2022 17:55:26 GMT -5
Just in time for the holidays.  |
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Post by Marshall on Dec 7, 2022 14:40:24 GMT -5
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Post by Marshall on Dec 7, 2022 14:44:11 GMT -5
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Post by Marshall on Dec 7, 2022 14:45:37 GMT -5
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Post by TKennedy on Dec 7, 2022 14:56:13 GMT -5
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Post by Marshall on Dec 11, 2022 20:40:40 GMT -5
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Post by Marshall on Dec 11, 2022 20:41:50 GMT -5
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Post by majorminor on Dec 14, 2022 12:21:24 GMT -5
Rusty is that you?!  |
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Post by Marshall on Dec 14, 2022 16:33:17 GMT -5
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Post by Rob Hanesworth on Dec 15, 2022 14:51:08 GMT -5
1. Dad, are we pyromaniacs? Yes, we arson.
2. What do you call a pig with laryngitis? Disgruntled.
3. Writing my name in cursive is my signature move.
4. Why do bees stay in their hives during winter? Swarm.
5. If you’re bad at haggling, you’ll end up paying the price.
6. Just so everyone’s clear, I’m going to put my glasses on.
7. A commander walks into a bar and orders everyone around.
8. I lost my job as a stage designer. I left without making a scene.
9. Never buy flowers from a monk. Only you can prevent florist friars.
10. How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced? A buccaneer.
11. I once worked at a cheap pizza shop to get by. I kneaded the dough.
12. My friends and I have named our band ‘Duvet’. It’s a cover band.
13. I lost my girlfriend’s audiobook, and now I’ll never hear the end of it.
14. Why is ‘dark’ spelled with a k and not c? Because you can’t see in the dark.
15. Why is it unwise to share your secrets with a clock? Well, time will tell.
16. When I told my contractor I didn’t want carpeted steps, they gave me a blank stare.
17. Bono and The Edge walk into a Dublin bar and the bartender says, “Oh no, not U2 again.”
18. Prison is just one word to you, but for some people, it’s a whole sentence.
19. Scientists got together to study the effects of alcohol on a person’s walk, and the result was staggering.
20. I’m trying to organize a hide and seek tournament, but good players are really hard to find.
21. I got over my addiction to chocolate, marshmallows, and nuts. I won’t lie, it was a rocky road.
22. What do you say to comfort a friend who’s struggling with grammar? There, their, they’re.
23. I went to the toy store and asked the assistant where the Schwarzenegger dolls are and he replied, “Aisle B, back.”
24. What did the surgeon say to the patient who insisted on closing up their own incision? Suture self.
25. I’ve started telling everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes. It’s all about raisin awareness.
26. To be Frank, I'd have to change my name.
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